Infertility and Mother’s Day

Another Mother’s Day is approaching and I remember the feeling I felt every year during the first 14 years of my marriage.  Going to church was the hardest as they would hand out flowers or another gift to mothers and I would feel depressed again.  Another year and I am still not pregnant. It was all I wanted to do was to be a mom!  I saw women who did not want babies getting pregnant easily.  All my siblings, except one unmarried brother, had children yet I was not able to become a mom.

I had infertility and I really did not know why. The CDC defines infertility as “not being able to get pregnant (conceive) after one year (or longer) of unprotected sex.”.   The CDC goes on to say 12% of women ages 15 to 44 have infertility or have problems carrying a pregnancy to term.  After my husband finished graduate school we looked into why we were not getting pregnant.  I remember one procedure where they inserted dye into me was very painful and really did not show any reasons why I was not getting pregnant.  I also have ugly scars just below my navel where they inserted a scope to look on the outside of my uterus.  They found some endometriosis but not enough to cause infertility. 

Many couples seek medical procedures such as “medicine, surgery, intrauterine insemination, or assisted reproductive technology” (CDC).  We did not want to spend thousands of dollars for procedures that may or may not work.  My husband had just finished grad school and started his career and we did not have much money back then.  So, we looked at our other options.

Some people, like us, are in the position to adopt but many cannot afford it.  The Adoption Network experts believe there are between one and two million couples wanting to adopt.  Some, like my friends were able to become foster parents and adopt three of the children placed in their care.  Other friends I know would give anything to become parents but circumstances are not allowing it. Adoption is expensive and very intrusive into one’s personal lives.   I wrote about this in a post called My Adoption Story https://northwoodsgirlblogging.com/my-adoption-story/

Every year on Mother’s Day I celebrate being a mom and now a grandmother but my heart still aches for those who have not experienced motherhood.  Like Sarah and Hannah of the Bible who prayed for a child I leaned on God for His timing.  God knows your heart.  Just place your trust in Him! (The above picture is of my mom a couple of years before she passed away holding a pictures of my four brothers.)

https://www.cdc.gov/reproductivehealth/infertility/index.htm

https://adoptionnetwork.com/adoption-statistics